Monday, August 27, 2012

Revealing a Lie; Details About My Wife; Updates

The lie I'm about to reveal was a secret kept between my wife and I for personal reasons. I'll give the lie first, then explain why I did so readers understand.

My wife and I actually had sex when we were sixteen. I had said in some posts that we hadn't had sex even after we turned eighteen, but we actually had. It is true that having sex in our dorm wasn't easy (wasn't kidding about the super-thin walls; even if we were quiet we could've been heard), but we had sex a few times before then, and we certainly have plenty now that we're on our own in a decent place. Sorry, mother-in-law, but I assure you we do it out of love as opposed to being sex-crazed.

Speaking of which, our parents were a major reason why we kept that fact a secret. My wife's parents are nice, but we had sex in their house while they were gone, so they understood why we lied, though they said they wouldn't have been harsh on us either way for a variety of reasons (my parents would've been pissed either way, though). First off, some guys at our school threatened to rape us to "turn us straight", so that jump-started our having sex just in case they actually did (and they didn't because word spread about it and they got in huge trouble for that). They also said they'd understand if we did regardless of that situation because of the fact that we had been together for more than a decade at that point and that we couldn't get each other pregnant anyway. In fact, they said they were shocked that we hadn't even decided to do it before.

So sorry if I lied to you, readers, but that's why. We just didn't want family to know, and they read this blog sometimes. Now that they know, there's no problem.

But speaking of problems, there's some little challenge-type thing my wife and I did not too long ago. We came up with it ourselves because we like to be honest with each other and discuss everything. What we did was confess things we didn't like about each other, or at least things that weren't perfect. This didn't start a fight, and we didn't even get upset, we just ultimately talked about little things that didn't even detract much.

For instance, I noted that, while my wife is pretty much the nicest person ever, sometimes I feel she's too nice to people who don't deserve being treated nicely at all and that she can be oversensitive, which she readily admitted to. She's so nice that she's the type of person who'd give Adolf Hitler a hug. Well, probably not, honestly, but she's a bit too trusting to people who are untrustworthy. Sometimes she wants to help people who are obviously deceptive, and that bounces back on both of us. I did, however, note afterward that I know why she does it and that I still think it's positive that she's just in-tune with other's and their needs and wants to help.

Conversely, she noted that my biggest problem is my stubbornness. Though I noted I do tend to admit when I'm wrong, I admitted to that with no problem, and I can see people not liking me for that reason (people are usually fine with me, though). I know she's had a problem with it before, too, because when it comes to discussion on important matters, such as having a child, she feels a little overwhelmed by it. We both definitely want children, it's just a matter of when and where and such. I'm still wanting to wait a bit, and she thinks she's ready now. She's willing to wait with me, though, because she realizes having a mutual consensus on when helps us both. She did note, however, that she thinks it's cute when I get passionate about various issues, tends to be behind me on what I stand for, and we've both influenced each other in our thinking despite my otherwise stubborn behavior. She also noted that I had often been right anyway, so she trusts my judgment despite personal problems she has with it.

Otherwise, we mostly just mentioned little details because we started having a little fun with this, like my gaseous emissions (especially because I like spicy food) and her singing at random. Through all of this, we decided we ultimately love those things about each other and prefer we don't change and ended up cuddling each other and saying we love each other a lot and eventually lead to us having sex again. I figured we'd be okay afterward, but I didn't think that would happen, but either way, we learned a lot. That's pretty crazy, though, that even after approaching twenty years in this relationship and knowing each other very well since we're kids that we're still learning about each other. Important lesson to be learned, folks.

And speaking of children, that's the other big announcement I have is we don't quite know when we want to get my wife artificially inseminated but it'll likely be soon. My wife wants to be inseminated because I'm absolutely disgusted with the idea of me doing it, and I even plan on getting my tubes tied eventually not because I don't want kids, but because the idea of semen getting inside me might scar me psychologically. My wife has always wanted a baby anyway, and she's real excited about it (and I am, too, despite wanting to wait a bit). She worries about what I think of the baby not actually being mine, but I assure her that I'll treat the baby as our own and not even think about it. We'll probably even tell her when she's old enough and even tell her not to go searching for her real father because that could hurt my feelings.

When it comes to this blog, though, after our child is born, I won't post anything new. Maybe finish something old or something I said I'd do (and that's unfortunately not a promise), but otherwise I'd be done. It's not even because nobody besides family really reads this, moreso because I want to dedicate my time to other activities, particularly those with family. If anything else happens, you'll know somehow, including if I die (which I doubt will happen, but you never know).

Speaking of which, I will post again soon, but that's what I want to do right now is spend time with my wife. 'Til next time.

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